Want To Be An Amazing Friend? Here’s the One Thing To Do
We all want to be surrounded and supported by amazing friends. And as we get older, our circle of close friends tends to get tighter and tighter. There are many great lessons about friendship that I have learned over the past 4 decades of my life, and being someone who didn’t always have a lot of friends, I’m very grateful to have so many amazing friends in my life now. In this post, I’ll share my number one tip to being an amazing friend and a few other friendship lessons.
So you want to be an amazing friend?
The key is to make it about the other person. I believe that we mistakenly go into a relationship believing that it’s all about us. That doesn’t actually work however. When we focus on the other person in a relationship, both people end up getting much more out of the relationship than if each person were simply focused on themselves.
Here’s what I mean. Let’s say that you have texted your friend and haven’t heard back from them for days. Your first instinct may be to assume that they are ignoring you or that you’ve done something wrong without knowing it. What if we turned the tables and looked at it from their perspective? Is it possible that they are completely swamped with work, kids, family or other obligations that have to take priority right now? Maybe they have just received some bad news and aren’t ready to share it with anyone so they aren’t responding to anyone. Perhaps they want to text you back but don’t remember until late at night when they are tucked into bed and they don’t want to disturb you too late.
Has this ever happened to you? You want to stay in touch, return all of the texts and phone calls, but for some reason or another, just aren’t able to? The next time you don’t hear back from a friend, remember that it’s not about you. Recently a friend posted on social media that she was being repeatedly texted by a client since she didn’t answer right away. As a mom and entrepreneur you can imagine that she has her hands very full. Yet there was an expectation that she would answer immediately.
Let’s give each other a little time and space to step away from our phones at least once a day. If someone isn’t answering, it’s not about you.
We are more connected than ever on social media, does this affect our friendships?
One of the blessings of this time in history is that thanks to social media, and more specifically Facebook, it’s easier to stay connected to more people. I have more friends now than I have ever had in my life – I’m not talking about the 2000+ ‘friends’ I have on my friends list, however I do find that I have relationships with more and more incredible people thanks to Facebook. And my family is across the country, so having Facebook allows us to feel like we are more a part of each other’s daily lives.
Often people complain about how Facebook has become an addiction and in some ways, it’s true. However if we use the same tactic – making it about the other person first – we can really add value on social media. When you are posting on any social media channel, ask yourself: am I adding value or taking away from others. We can focus on others by commenting on their photos, sharing their content and cheering each other on. Celebrate other’s successes when they post about them instead of only commenting when they post negative news.
Let’s help build each other up instead of tearing each other down. Focus on adding value on social media and making it about the other person first.
How high are our expectations? Does this affect our friendships?
I’ll share one last tip to be being an amazing friend that I learned from Tony Robbins. Change your expectations to appreciation. You and I both know that when we have expectations from others, there is an opportunity to be let down. When we shift to appreciation and gratitude for that person, the way we treat them and our relationship changes overnight. The reason behind most broken relationships is because one person had expectations that the other person didn’t meet. Always assume that the other person is doing the best they can at any given moment and you will find that it’s much easier to let go of expectations.
It’s been said that you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with. If this is the case, then it would be a great choice to want to be an amazing friend to at least those five people. Why not focus on put the focus on other people first in any situation? Imagine how different our world would be if we chose to act this way in all of our daily interactions with people.
Let’s focus on others first. Will you join me in being an amazing friend today?
Wealthylicious Burlington is BACK!: Want to learn how to create wealth? Please join me for an evening of wealth, wisdom and wellness on Tuesday June 20th at the Burlington Golf & Country Club. This event is full of great speakers who will share their expertise. Key topics include creating wealth and the power of network marketing. We’ll also cover how to diversify your income and invest in your health. http://www.wealthyliciousburlington.eventbrite.ca.
Special Guest Leanne Jacobs will be speaking at Wealthylicious. Leanne is the author of the international best-seller, Beautiful Money: The 4-Week Total Wealth Makeover.